When truth and facts collide

Published: Mon, 09/30/19

Hi ,


Is it already a month since I got back from the Mercian Gathering? September has been rather stressful for reasons I will elaborate on below. The MG was very good again this year. I led well attended Stav training sessions each morning and my talk seemed to go down very well. I caught up with a lot of old friends and made new ones. I also attended other people’s talks and workshops, most of which were well worth the time. Perhaps the most interesting talk, which also contained a useful idea to take away, was delivered by a historian and archeologist by the name of Daryl Baxter. The subject of Daryl’s talk was the story of king Arthur and the historical basis of the legend. As you might expect there was no firm conclusion as to who Arthur might have been but we were treated to a fascinating history of the early post roman period in Britain, about 450 to 600 AD, which is when the legend of Arthur as king of the Britons seem to
have originated.

The most useful part of the talk explained the reason why it can be very difficult having sensible conversations about contentious issues. In our minds we relate to facts and truths and we bridge the gap between facts and truths with beliefs. What is the difference between a fact and a truth? A fact can be defined as something that is very easily demonstrated, such as it is raining, or the sun is shining. A fact can also be a prediction which is likely to come true to a very high level of probability, such as the sun rising tomorrow morning or a high tide occurring in the next 24 hours. A truth is an emotionally accepted reality which is important for its emotional significance. Belief is the link between the two. There is no real need to invest much emotion in the reality that the sun will rise tomorrow because you know that it is going to happen anyway.

Apparently the stories of King Arthur and the knights of his round table are held to be truths by a surprising number of people and have been for a long time. Amongst names on the French casualty list at the battle of Agincourt in 1415 there were many Arthurian names including Lancelots, a Gawain, a Perceval, a Tristian and an Arthur which suggests a serious devotion to the Arthurian romance amongst the French Nobility. Of course there is nothing wrong with people enjoying an inspirational story. The problem arises when a belief in an emotional truth leads to a search for facts to support that belief. There maybe few if any facts to discover, there may also be a very hostile response to anyone who reveals facts which directly contradict an emotional truth. The story of Galileo and the pressure that was put on him by a Catholic Church which did not want to admit that the earth orbited the sun rather than the other way around is just
one example and by no means the worst. The whole concept of political correctness is a conflict between objective facts and socially and politically acceptable ‘truth’.

My personal collision of facts and truth emerged in the past couple of weeks. My mother is 93 and is suffering from some kind of dementia. She has been in a home located in Epsom, Surrey since November last year. My sister made the decision to move my mother into care because of physical disability rather than her mental state, which, at the time was more confused and forgetful than demented. I believed that the home in Epsom was not really giving my mother the care and stimulation she really needed and that she might be better off elsewhere. A place eventually became available in a care home near where Venetia and I live in Beverley. My family agreed to the move and two weeks ago we moved my mother from Epsom to East Yorkshire. Without going into all the details it would be reasonable to say that things did not work out too well. It wasn’t that my mother did not like the place, but she was restless and even violent when her
behavior was challenged. On Tuesday last week we transferred my mother back to the home we had taken her from a week before. Her room was still vacant and the staff welcomed her back like an old friend. It seems like she is now back where she belongs and she will almost certainly now remain there until the end of her life. It was my belief that she could adapt to a more stimulating and communal environment and she would be all the better for it. In fact she has deteriorated mentally past the point where she can interact socially. So, the reality is that my mother now needs a home where she can be largely left on her own and not expected to conform to normal social expectations. I was reminded of the scene at the end of the film Rain Man where the Tom Cruise character has to accept that his autistic brother (played by Dustin Hoffman) does need to live in an institution for his own good. Both the brother in the film and I had to
accept that our belief that our loved one could still live a ‘normal’ life just did not match up with the facts. Such a realisation is not easy to come to terms with, but no one benefits when a delusional truth is clung to in the face of contrary facts of life.

Regards

Graham

PS Next weekend in Sussex, near Uckfield I will be collaborating with Maddy Elruna to deliver a course which will explore both the Galdre and Seid aspects of Stav. I will be teaching the Galdre aspect which will include stances and martial training. Maddy, who learned Seid from Shaun Brassfield-Thorpe and has practiced as a Shamanic healer for many years will lead the Seid side of the event. Check it out at https://www.maddyelruna.co.uk/stav-gathering