All in the mind?
Published: Fri, 08/16/19
part three of a series of five posts. First one looked at how drowning in too much information holds us back. Second, how a fear of not having enough knowledge prevents us from starting when can easily find out what we need to know when we actually need it. The third one? Well, this is illustrating itself in that this seemed like a good idea when I started writing the first post this morning. It is now half past six in the evening and I am not feeling nearly as sure as I did. We have access to information, we can gain knowledge just in time as it is required, but our minds are not static. Our thoughts and focus changes from moment to moment, certainly from hour to hour. I don’t just mean feelings and emotions either. Our emotions are largely governed by hormones and these chemical messengers are released according to external stimuli. We usually know that once we start doing something the body will fall into line within reason.
If we exercise endorphins will be released, if we eat food at the right time our digestive system will be happy to play its part. The much bigger problem is the way we think about things which means that we believe we can’t do something even when we are perfectly capable of achieving it. Or we convince ourselves that there is no purpose in doing something that we have enjoyed very much on previous occasions. Depression is a highly sensitive issue since depressed people don’t like being told that their unhappiness is all in the mind, such statements make them even more sad and angry. On the other hand, where else can depression be except in the mind? The bad news is that the mind is not static and sometimes my mind takes me into some pretty dark places. The good news is that the mind is not static and mine can take me into some good places too. Between the two are places where I am focused and able to achieve a lot. There are
also places where there is no focus or clarity and it is very hard to get started on anything or complete it.
One of the reasons why email marketing is considered a good idea is that contact is maintained over a period of time. During that time the recipient’s mind will change and move. The messages will touch the reader in different states of mind and develop a relationship with the person in their highs and lows. If the messages are really working then the messages will consistently raise spirits and brighten each day that they are read. Then, when there is a decision to move forward and take a further step, attending a course or signing up for a training programme, that decision comes from a relationship of trust rather than a spur of the moment response. Even if there is no actual sale it is still nice to share stories and ideas with people who benefit from reading them.
So, how can we manage a non-static mind? Firstly we need to recognise that having minds that are capable of changing and adapting is a good thing. Otherwise we would never be able to learn anything or cope with new situations. Having seen dementia first hand recently I wonder if a demented mind essentially becomes static and therefore incapable of responding to the world as it actually is. That is a big subject and something to explore another time. For the moment, just accept that a changeable mind is a good thing, if you can manage it properly.
Secondly, we need to accept that our mind is not actually who we are. Who are we really? That is another big question which I am not going into here, but our minds are just a process going on (probably) between our ears. We can observe that process and, as we observe, the process will change. You may be full of doubt and fear or full of hope and enthusiasm, either way it won’t last.
Thirdly, the real you has ways of dealing with your changeable mind. Three very important methods are:
Commitment, which is why we have institutions such as marriage, why public servants such as police officers and soldiers take oaths and why some people believe it is important to commit themselves to a particular religion. The mind may fluctuate but commitment keeps us on a particular path.
Practice, if commitment is something we make to society in order to discipline the mind, then practice is something we do for ourselves. Daily Stav stances is a practice to be done regardless of what the mind says about whether it is worth the effort or not. Walking your dog every morning is both a commitment to the dog and a practice for you. It does not really matter what the practice is so long as it is something that is done regardless of your state of mind. If your practice is something healthy and life enhancing then so much the better, but that isn’t actually the point.
Take action regardless, your mind will try and convince you that you need more information. Your mind will also suggest that you will make mistakes for lack of knowledge. Action will change your mind, even if your mind tells you that the present state is reality. Just remember that the state of your mind is not reality.
However, this is not all there is to it, there are still two more factors which we frequently allow to mess up our lives and spoil our plans. More on that on Monday.
regards
Graham
PS I will be seeing Chris Halpin and Lauren Ireland who run the York School of Defence gat Fightcamp. They will be teaching a seminar in Beverley with me on the 2nd November, full details here http://beverleystav.uk/hema02112019.html