Bad word of the day - TRY
Published: Sun, 09/27/15
Are there such things as ‘bad’ words? I don’t mean swear words or offensive terms. I mean words which affect our thinking and reveal our actual intentions. We tend to use bad words unconsciously. However, by becoming conscious of the words we are using and what is revealed about our thinking we gain a valuable opportunity to know ourselves better. As Sun Tzu wrote 25 centuries ago, ‘Know yourself an know the other, 100 challenges without defeat.’ Recognising which words we use about ourselves and our situation can be a major step in becoming more effective as human beings. So, what I mean by bad words are the terms which programme our minds for failure (failure maybe a bad word too, but I will come back to that another time). Bad words also reveal our true intentions and attitudes to others when used unconsciously. Of course, once we become conscious the same words become an education for us. (Good word; ‘conscious’.)
So the worst bad word? Well, today my nomination is for ‘try’ as in ‘I really will try’ and I tried really hard’ and ‘I am trying’ (to which it is tempting to reply, ‘yes, you certainly are!’).
In the sport of rugby ‘try’ is a good thing, it means that the ball has been touched down behind the opposing goal line and this apparently helps towards winning the match. This is also an oxymoron (great word that) in the sense that ‘try’ means to attempt and in the case of a rugby try the ball either is, or is not, on the ground behind the goal line. So to try and score a try becomes a contradiction in terms.
Which brings me to the big problem with the word try. According to the dictionary try means attempt or test. There is also the specific meaning of trying an accused person in a court of law. Again that is a specific and serious process. So, apart from the specific meanings of a rugby touchdown or a judicial process the word try is pretty much redundant. When it is used it tends to cover lazy thinking and provides a handy excuse for not really bothering.
You may have heard or read me quoting before from Yoda in Star Wars when the wise Jedi Muppet says to a despondent Luke Skywalker. “Do or do not, there is no try.”
Yes, you can use ‘try’ and ‘attempt’ interchangeably in the sense of getting a recalcitrant vehicle to start. One person checking various things under the bonnet and saying from time to time. ‘try starting it again.’ to test whether the problem has been solved or not. However, there is a world of difference between a systematic process of checking the variables which will prevent a vehicle from starting, adding fuel, charging a battery, changing spark (petrol) or glow plugs (diesel) and then testing/trying for a specific result. Or just turning the engine over and over until the battery is flat while protesting. ‘I really am trying to start this car.’
It is the same with Stav training. I don’t need to be told that you tried to get to a class or course. It may be that you set out and got stuck in a major traffic jam. (I count that as a serious attempt.) Or it may have been that when it came to it you could not be bothered to get out of bed that morning, in which case don’t abuse that already much misused three letter word. It is a perfectly free choice not to do something but please don’t then justify yourself by claiming you ‘tried’.
When teaching I will often hear students say, I am trying to get this right. In which case I usually have to say, don’t try, just do what you have been shown. Do it as slowly and as gently as you need to. But do, don’t try. This especially applies when practising striking in CQC, the harder you try, the less power is generated. The more you just are and do the more that can happen. It is very strange, yet that is how it works.
Then of course there is personal practice. Do not try to do a full galdre stances everyday and 1000 cuts with each weapon. Well, you can try and do it every day at 5 am, in your dreams, and then get up at 8 am and barely make it to work. Or do 5 or 10 minutes a day and actually get the benefits.
So, monitor the words you use when talking about yourself and your aspirations. When you catch yourself using the word ‘try’, stop and ask yourself what Yoda would have to say.
regards
Graham
PS If you want to do some CQC training for self-defence then there is a course in Crewkerne on Saturday 3rd October. See http://www.somersetstav.co.uk/sd.html If you are interested in the Axe video so that you can do some training yourself you can check it out at http://www.iceandfire.org.uk/dvd2.html